You know what the operative word in “oral sex” is? Sex! We don’t treat it that way, though. Garrett Hao showed us both the greatest weakness, and amazing potential of oral sex in this month’s What’s Your Fetish column. Go get a taste.
Passion For Purity
The obsession with virginity is a problem for all sex acts, but it takes a particularly heavy psychological toll on oral sex. In America, baseball and it’s bases are used as an analogy for how much of a person you’re allowed to touch and taste. Not only does this obsessive hesitation lead to an abundance of sexual frustration, it also perpetuates delusional beliefs about virginity.
As Garrett mentions, oral sex is often seen a tool for preserving virginity while increasing intimacy. The same nonsensical belief is applied to anal sex as well. But this isn’t just a coming of age delusion. We have so many laws and cultural traditions that reinforce the heteronormative and phallocentric falsehood that penis in vagina sex is the only authentic sex.
Of course, we know this is bullshit, right? Let’s go ahead and take that line of thinking, and draw some absurd conclusions from it. Lesbians are never having sex. Not only that, unless they’ve had sex with a man before accepting their sexuality, they are virgins too. (Of course, religious texts that preach male supremacy often speak of the wrongs of male-on-male homosexuality, yet are suspiciously silent about woman-on-woman. Anyway, onward.) A bisexual woman can be in a monogamous relationship with a man, and it won’t be cheating if she sees a woman on the side. Oral isn’t incest. See, none of these are statements true, because they are all based on a false premise.
Mild, Medium, Or Spicy
The truth of the matter is oral sex is sex. Not only that, it’s vanilla sex. Oral sex is a common practice, regardless of orientation and anatomy. Sex often begins and ends with a kiss. So, regardless of what happens in between, our mouths are always involved.
However, oral sex doesn’t have to be vanilla. After all, it can be a vehicle for a number of other fetishes. For example, face-fucking and face-sitting are practices of dominance and erotic asphyxiation. We fetishize the consumption of genital fluids, as Garrett also mentioned. Oral sex is often, if not nearly always, involved in double penetration, group sex, and gangbangs.
Oh, and let’s not forget biting, my favorite oral fetish. This usually doesn’t involve the genitals, though it can if you’re careful. Speaking of biting, nowhere is our fascination with the sexuality of the mouth more prolific than with vampires. They are sexually symbolic in so many ways, but it all comes back to those delicious lips, and the sharp teeth behind them.
As anyone can see, our social hang-ups are a major obstacle to the acceptance and enjoyment of our sexuality. You should at least attempt to shift your views toward that acceptance, so we can all enjoy the buffet of pleasures available to us. In The Witch, Black Philip asks “Dost thou want to live deliciously?” Well, do you? Go down and tell us in the poll below.
End rant :*